A WELL-TRAINED WIFE by Tia Levings - Spotlight

 “Today it hit me when he hit me, blood shaking in my brain. Maybe there wasn’t a savior coming. Maybe it was up to me to save me.”

Recruited into the fundamentalist Quiverfull movement as a young wife, Tia Levings learned that being a good Christian meant following a list of additional life principles––a series of secret, special rules to obey. Being a godly and submissive wife in Christian Patriarchy included strict discipline, isolation, and an alternative lifestyle that appeared wholesome to outsiders. Women were to be silent, “keepers of the home.”

Tia knew that to their neighbors her family was strange, but she also couldn't risk exposing their secret lifestyle to police, doctors, teachers, or anyone outside of their church. Christians were called in scripture to be “in the world, not of it.” So, she hid in plain sight as years of abuse and pain followed. When Tia realized she was the only one who could protect her children from becoming the next generation of patriarchal men and submissive women, she began to resist and question how they lived. But in the patriarchy, a woman with opinions is in danger, and eventually, Tia faced an urgent and extreme choice: stay and face dire consequences, or flee with her children.

Told in a beautiful, honest, and sometimes harrowing voice, A Well-Trained Wife is an unforgettable and timely memoir about a woman's race to save herself and her family and details the ways that extreme views can manifest in a marriage.

I’m Tia Levings, a writer, creator, guest expert, and content specialist. I shine light on the abuses of Christian fundamentalism and offer contextual insight into the true horrors of religious trauma. My memoir, A Well-Trained Wife: My Escape from Christian Patriarchy, releases with St. Martin’s Press on August 6th, 2024. 

My videos on social media have millions of views. Through the lens of my personal experience, I connect entertainment, news headlines, and current events to fundamentalist influences and strategy. 

I write about religious trauma and Christian fundamentalism to educate, validate, and empower those who feel smashed by the patriarchy. To create something beautiful from pain. And, because when I went through the hell of church-sanctioned violence, I felt alone and I wasn’t. There are thousands of others out there. 

I want you to know you aren’t alone. And even if the church condones and shelters it, abuse is never okay.